Thursday, October 07, 2004


Today is quite a "mixed" day. Firstly I am quite sick and I took MC to stay at home to rest, but in the end I din really rested cos' I was working through my teaching materials for Dreamweaver + PHP + MySQL. I think I have worked straight 14 hrs with 2-one hr lunch and dinner break. And I feel kinda of tired now. Read my pals' blogs and kinda have some things to think about.

It happens to me too, to be unable to forgive and forget. And recently, I also got quite pissed with someone (not my family, not my friend either) and everytime I have no choice but to talk to him (over some unavoidable issues) I find that I am burning inside! Cos' I still feel the anger towards this person and I cannot bring myself to feel 'normal'! I tend to speak in a more 'hostile' or 'cold' way, and speak lesser too. My eyes also seemed to avoid this person's eyes just as to 'keep a distance'. I seldom feel this way. But I know certainly that it is torturing myself. And to think that this person dun even realised his mistake/want to apologise for his word, I think I am torturing myself for nothing! Sometimes, I just feel quite poisoned by those 'hate' feelings, but I dun noe how to deal with it / him now that I started the 'hostile' stance. Haiz. It is such a horrible experience!


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